March 28, 2012

Will I do it again?

I am asked this question so often. I don't mind the question. In fact, I absolutely LOVE talking about surrogacy. I think the question started before I even entered my second trimester. I joked that the question should not be asked while I was still in the injection/morning sickness phase. The first trimester wasn't very kind to me. I was tired, sick and doing my best to handle the extra hormones from the injections (without ripping my husband's head off like I was some sort of man-eating beast). But I knew what the precious results would be and that helped me get through it. Today those not-so-great days are a very faded memory. The delivery is also a faded memory. Women are amazing in that respect (that's right mommas, give yourself a high five... you deserve it). Almost every woman I talk to about the bumps in pregnancy say the same. All of the pregnancy woes become faded memories. If the memories didn't fade... I guarantee we would have a lot of one child families. Some women enjoy labor and delivery. Me, not so much but it's part of the process. I do enjoy pregnancy very much though.

I will say that I feel surrogacy can become quite addicting. While I am quite sure I will look into doing this again I have some hesitations. My main hesitation is: will I find another couple that I bond so well with? I want to have a relationship with whomever I take this journey with. Before I met the guys, I didn't realize how important that was to me. I don't think I could have daydreamed a better journey than the one I experienced. It leaves me wondering if I do this again... could a second journey be as great? I imagine that it definitely could be.

I have no questions about the agency - they did an amazing job. The process flowed along so smoothly. They made appointments, told me when and where to be, made travel arrangements for the transfer... they made it easy. I suppose that is what they are paid for so it makes sense. I can't even imagine doing this without the help of an agency.

Here I am 2 1/2 months postpartum and thinking the chances of me doing this again are very high. When I am asked the question "will I do it again" my answer is that I will look into doing it again. Not now, in a year or so. I am not getting any younger so if the right couple came along I would do it sooner rather than later. But my goal is to wait at least until next January to start.

I'd love to hear from any other surrogates. Will you do it again? How many times have you done it already? Any hesitations about doing it again for a different couple?


  1. A few hours after birth my surrogate mentioned how she forgot all about the labor with her son and barely even knew what happened with the twins she just delivered. Granted it was a very fast delivery, but still! I really am amazed by the human body. The mind really is more powerful than the body.

  2. I knew going into this that it was a one time experience for me: no matter how smooth or enjoyable the ride it was always going to be that. I'm sure it's because I didn't go into this out of an interest in surrogacy, but rather out of an interest in making my friend a father. After this, I think I'll feel like I've done my bit!

  3. Well dear please don't tell Roy about your plan or I will be in for a hard time.
    A. I am well aware that there are women how give birth to 10 and even 12 children BUT I would hope you would ask Dr Which about what she tinks is best for you.
    B. I think going for another gay couple would be easier cause you wount have do deal with an infertile woman
    C. Alway remember that we are the best couple, best match and had the best kids!
    You are totaly amazing!