December 23, 2013

Ultrasounds and visits

Ahhh.. what a great week. After lost luggage and many, way too many, hours of no sleep, Guy and Dror arrived in Minnesota last Monday. We arranged to meet up Tuesday for breakfast. I have only met them once in person and that visit was a very quick 3ish hours long. I have to say it feels like we have known each other much longer than 9 months and have hung out many more times than just once. It felt very natural being with them.

Wednesday we walked around the mall. The mall one week before Christmas... yep we're brave like that. Actually it was fine and we didn't encounter any annoying, crazy shoppers. I was hoping to get a picture with Santa but it must have been his lunch time because he was no where to be found. Wednesday evening the guys came over to our house for dinner. My kids were so excited to finally meet them. The two younger kids had already met them but my two older ones had not. The guys are so good with kids and my kids easily fell in love with them. It was fun to watch them together. I'm guessing Guy and Dror are their nieces and nephews favorite uncles. It was even more proof of how wonderful they will be as dads. They even brought gifts for everyone... it was so thoughtful of them. Guy and Dror's parents sent me a lotion, body wash and candle set along with a beautifully written card. The kind gesture was very much appreciated.

Photobombed by the dog

Picture with my boys (my daughter had retreated to her room)

Thursday was the anatomy ultrasound. Big, big day!

Pit stop for coffee
The appointment was full of excitement. As I said before we knew the genders at transferred but I wasn't going to share until Guy and Dror were ready. You are in luck! They are ready to let the world know they will be having one boy and one girl!They are both measuring 20 weeks and 5 days. Baby boy weighs 12oz and Baby girl weighs 13oz. We have two head down babies. I have fingers and toes crossed they stay that way. I know they have plenty of time to move around in all kinds of different positions but in the end let's hope for two head down babies. A funny note... both babies are trying to reach the cervix first. Right now, it could go either way. I didn't even know this was possible. I assumed one baby was always positioned closest to the cervix. The tech named boy as baby A and girl as baby B. She said to not be surprised if that changes. I'm not posting any pictures from this ultrasound because they won't even compare to what I'm about to show you.

During my journey with Roy and Avner, I surprised them with a 4D ultrasound. I knew for sure I would do this for Guy and Dror during this visit. 20 weeks is a little early for 4D ultrasounds just because the babies generally are not quite "looking like babies". The tech said they would probably look like something that resembled half sea monkey half alien ???... lol, alrighty then. No matter to us, we were still way excited to get this awesome look into the womb. I chose the imaging place I used with Ella and Ely. The bonus... they upgraded their equipment. The images before were excellent but the images now are mind blowing! Seriously... so cool. I recommend any pregnant woman get this done.

The appointment was loads of fun. The babies are still fighting for first position. The tech called baby girl A and baby boy B. When I say they are fighting, I mean that literally. At one point, baby girl was hitting her brother in the face while he tried to protect himself with his hands. Another moment captured them telling "secrets". Baby girl had her hands up by her mouth while baby boy looked to be putting his ear to her hands. Such a sweet sweet view. We captured so many sweet and amazing moments. Another showed them cuddling together head to head. Here are a few images from the screening:

Baby girl giving us a smile

Baby girl
Baby boy

Baby boy. Can you see him holding his hand up?
Guy and Dror are madly in love with these babies. They were so happy with their visit and the peeks at their babies. The joy just seeps out of them. We joked they would spend the next few days just starring at the pictures. Only it's not really a joke because I'm sure they really will, I know I would. Later I received this picture:

Maybe it's the hormones, but this absolutely melts my heart and makes my eyes get teary.
After the 4D ultrasound we stood in the parking lot and said our goodbyes. Their visit had come to an end. I feel a little emptiness since we parted ways. I know I'll see them again very soon but the puzzle feels complete when they are around. It's very similar to how I felt when Roy and Avner left after our transfer in 2011. It's all part of this process. After dinner on Wednesday night, Guy said how happy they were to be here this week. They really struggled with not being able to attend the transfer and I was bummed by that too. But given the choice between attending transfer or the 20 week ultrasound, we all agreed how fantastic this week was and how happy we are that it could happen.

November 25, 2013

Pregnancy massage & brain drain

Awhile back, Guy and Dror sent me a sweet email telling me how they wished they could be here for me while morning sickness was taking over my body. Or better yet, they said, take it away. It was a rough time for me, but I knew it would eventually pass. That thought process can greatly improve one's attitude and outlook.

The email went on to say that since they couldn't be here in person the next best thing would be for them to send me something to let me know how much they cared for and appreciated me. They thought about sending candy but with "all the weird preferences a pregnant woman is having" they decided against that. Haha - that makes me laugh, they really do know about the ever-changing cravings of a pregnant woman. They thought about sending flowers but with my super sonic smelling ability thought maybe it could make me feel worse.

In the end, they decided on a gift card to a massage spa. I had a one hour massage last Saturday and it was absolutely lovely. The therapist did an amazing job. I left the appointment in a drunk state of relaxation. If you have ever had a massage you know how it transports you into a whole new world. After the massage you walk out of the dark and relaxing room and are immediately forced to join the human species again. It's a funny feeling. Especially since you know you have this crazy dreamy expression on your face and if you had a scalp massage... who knows what your hair looks like. Of course, you try to tame the mane but in that dark room it could be easy to misjudge your efforts.

The massage was perfect and I'm so thankful for Guy and Dror's thoughtful gesture.

In other pregnancy news, major cravings have come to a halt. Currently, I don't have any "must-haves". You won't find me complaining about that. Cravings can be very mind consuming. They take over every thought and distract me until I give in to them.

I am beginning to have "pregnancy brain drain". This can be compared to aliens (aka babies) draining my memory and common sense. Almost like I'm in a daydream la-la state when the drain is happening. Thank goodness it's not every day, all day. Studies have shown that pregnant women are actually smarter during pregnancy - I don't buy it. One of my latest stunts was a few nights ago. I called my daughter from the store to ask her to check if our printer needed a 60 or 61 ink cartridge. This is something I can never remember. She looked and told me. All it took for me to forget was the walk from the parking lot to the ink cartridge section of the store. Instead of calling, because I had already called her twice before for unrelated questions, I sent her a text asking if she said it was 61. The funniest part is that I knew exactly how she would respond. Her response "OMG MOM YES". She's such a teenager!

Another drain story, twice in the last month I have walked away from my van to enter a store and left the side door open. Usually one of the kids will hit the button to close it. I generally always notice when they don't. Today was one of those days it didn't get closed. As I was paying at the gas station, I looked out at the parking lot and thought "oops someone forgot to close their...  ahhhhh, that's my van". Thankfully, with the exception of Scooby Doo movies, we don't keep valuable stuff in there.

Just for fun, I'm throwing in a 16 week 5 day bump:

  Countdown to when Guy and Dror will be here: 3 weeks!

November 12, 2013

Almost 15 weeks

We are sailing right along to 15 weeks. Babies are growing and growing and so is the bump. I wish I could say my bump is all babies but it's not. Once a person has been pregnant so many times, in my case 6, your body just knows what to do, it gets a little cocky and starts taking shape much sooner. I'd say my true bump is about half the size of this. But anyway who's measuring... there is a bump and I'm diggin' it.

I know you didn't stop by just to hear about or see the bump. You want babies, am I right? You are in luck. Today was an OB appointment. It was quick and painless. Most importantly, we had a sneak peek at the babies. My OB uses a portable machine at every appointment. I love it.

As soon as the OB prepped me for the u/s I could feel the little sweeties gearing up for their performance. Sure enough they were tapping toes during the u/s. Baby B more so than Baby A. Baby A was busy either checking out or sucking on his/her thumb. Speaking of his/her, he/she... isn't fun that I know the genders of both babies and most of you don't. Hahaha! Yes, I'm evil. I just hope I don't slip up before Guy and Dror are ready to tell. It could be such an easy slip especially lately since my brain isn't functioning at its full capacity.

Both babies are growing well. Both heartbeats were around 170. My OB didn't measure them but it's noticeable they have grown.
Baby A (hand by face)

Baby B chillin' (for only a moment though)
OB said these are the babies faces... (?)
Babies are positioned head to head. Baby A, you know the one that comes out first, yeah he/she is feet down. If baby A is in a breech or transverse position at birth, it's an automatic C-Section. It's way too early to worry though. Baby B is head down. So the babies heads are right on top of each other. And they are really close!

In other super exciting news, Guy and Dror will be here in 5 weeks! I think we are all just a little bit anxious for Dec 16 to get here. Even more so for Dec 19. Why? That's the biggie ultrasound. It will be amazing to see the guys experience the ultrasound face to face. We will also meet with my OB and take a tour of the hospital. They plan to be here before the birth but I figure we may as well do it now just in case things get wild at the end of the pregnancy.

October 29, 2013

12/13 weeks

Last Wednesday marked us at 12 weeks. (Side note:When I was pregnant with my own children I would say "we/us" too. My husband was just as much part of the milestones during pregnancy as I was. I also feel this way about the IPs. So I say "we/us". I know some people roll their eyes to that... boo to you.)

Thursday we had a nuchal translucency screening. This screening helps detect birth defects. It involves an ultrasound where the tech measures fluid on the back of the fetuses necks. I was determined to have the guys on Facetime to witness this ultrasound. Up until now I've only had transvaginal ultrasounds (don't be jealous) and since they were monitoring appointments through a satellite location the guys weren't allowed to watch via Facetime/Skype. Annoying, I know. But the wait was ABSOLUTELY worth it.

At the last monitoring ultrasound (at 10 weeks), I could see the babies moving. That in itself is such a fun and amazing thing to watch. I knew the guys would be happy to hear this but bummed they couldn't witness it. So back to Thursday's u/s, the tech allowed us to do Facetime and was so terrific about pointing things out on the screen. Right away we could see the babies moving. It was a perfect ultrasound. As I held the phone up to the machine I watched the guys watch their babies in live-mode for the first time. Their reactions, smiles and excitement was more than I could have imagined. It's one of the moments during a surrogate's pregnancy that words really can't describe. The joy, the love, the I-can't-believe-I'm-privileged-enough-to-do-this and so many other emotions.

As for me physically, I am feeling much better. The nausea and exhaustion were crazy for awhile. I stopped all medication almost two weeks. What a relief. I'm so happy we have this medication in order to allow surrogacy as an option but after many weeks, months of shots every day... it's good to be done. My cravings are different weekly. Pizza, soup, pretty much anything Italian, blue raspberry Icees, gravy and mashed potatoes (babies are prepping for Thansgiving), now I'm back to chicken noodle soup and Italian. My cravings have never been this all over the board and strong. The Icees were a problem for a few days. There are only a few places in Rochester that have an Icee machine. Imagine driving to one of those places and having a red blinking light on the machine... broken. Not cool.

My belly is noticeably a bump now. Thank goodness! It's tough going through those few weeks of "is she pregnant or did she eat too much at lunch" phase.

Here I am at 9 weeks

13 weeks (actually 12 weeks 6 days) two different views

October 02, 2013

9 Weeks

I'm taking a break from the morning sickness train to give a update.

I had some spotting a few weeks ago which freaked me out because I never had any bleeding whatsoever in my past 5 pregnancies. The bleeding was very light and I had no cramping so I wasn't too concerned but it lasted most of the day and that warranted some "what-ifs". Dr. S instructed me to take an extra shot of progesterone and rest. I was happy to oblige. Jeremy already had plans to take the boys to his parents so I had a whole day of peace and quiet. With 3 crazy boys, life is rarely quiet when they are around. The following day I had my 2nd ultrasound and the tech found two babies and two strong heartbeats right away. I'm happy to say I've had no bleeding since then.

Today I had my 3rd ultrasound. Another great report. Two babies, two strong heartbeats. The babies were noticeably bigger this week. Crazy what a week and 2 days will do.

As for how I'm feeling... it really depends on the day, but mostly I'm way tired (more tired than I remember being with Ella and Ely). I have days I should hire a personal motivational speaker to get me off the couch or to get me moving so I can get lunch ready for my boys. I'm so lucky to work out of my home. Not sure how I would function working outside the home. Morning sickness... imagine having a nagging hangover for days and weeks and months. That pretty much sums it up. Every morning I wake up feeling like the previous night was spent filling up on wine and managing to get only 3 hours of sleep. Every day, all day long... that's how I feel. I'm not complaining, just explaining.

I'm not really showing yet. I'm puffing out but I blame that on the medication and bloating. Speaking of medications, can we be done already?!? I only have about 2 weeks left. That's not so bad. I will be happy to drop them though.

September 18, 2013

Confirmed TWINS!

We had our first ultrasound last Monday. Considering the outrageous beta counts I wasn't surprised to see two sacs.

 It's twins again!

Baby A:
128bpm and 6.1mm

Baby B:
126bpm and 7.1mm

We have a due date of May 9. We already know the genders of these little beans, but I'm not telling... yet anyway.

September 10, 2013

2nd Beta Results

Yesterday we had another beta test. The results were 23507(19 dpt). Woohoo! A great number! 

I'm definitely feeling pregnant. I'm tired all day long. Morning sickness (lasting all day) is sinking its teeth in just enough to let me know what's in store for my future.  I suspect I will be graduating to spontaneous vomiting any day now. I would normally take Unisom to curve m/s but IVF prefers I don't until after I'm released from their care. Zofran is the option they choose. It doesn't help 100% but it's better than nothing. 

Our first ultrasound is on Monday. Hoping for two heartbeats! 

September 05, 2013

Beta results are in!

At 13dpt, my beta is 3278! That's pregnant... like very, very pregnant! Like pregnant with twins pregnant! Watch out world, we gotta pregnant lady over here!

Telling the IPs the beta results is one thing about my first journey I wish we could have done differently. When we received the results, Avner was working a night shift and not available. It would have been nice to give the news to both Roy and Avner at the same time. But in the end the news was shared and both daddies were pumped to become fathers.

For this second journey, it was important to me that I tell both Guy and Dror together and that we did so over Skype. Even before the transfer had taken place, I could not wait for the moment I would tell them the good news (optimistic much?). I was looking for a fun way to tell them the exciting news. My idea was to show them a positive hpt via Skype. Immediately after getting my blood drawn I went to Target and bought a hpt. Came home and immediately took the test. Because of the way I have been feeling, I was not surprised to see "pregnant" show up not even 2 minutes into the test.

That idea flopped though. My blood work needed to be redone later in the day because not enough blood was collected during the first draw. By the time we received the results (a little more than 24 hours later) the digital had wiped clean. Sure, I could have taken the remaining test but I decided this sign would be just as fun:

Telling Guy and Dror this news was ahhhhh-mazing! I can't even tell you how amazing it was to watch their reactions. I only showed them "congratulations daddies" at first. After witnessing their pure joy, I said "wait there's more" and that's when I showed the last line "it's twins". I keep replaying it in my head. Having the privilege of telling them they are going to be parents is such an indescribable feeling.

So many hearts are happy today!

So the pressure of the 2ww is done and over with! Now we move on to waiting for the first ultrasound which should be in about two weeks.

**I should add that of course we don't know for sure that it's twins, but with that high of a beta it's safe to assume so.

September 03, 2013

This wait might be the end of me!

If we thought the 2ww (that's the 2 week wait between the day of transfer and the day of beta results), try again. The longest wait ever is the day of the beta results. That's today. I'm suffering over here just waiting to hear "yay" or "nay". This pregnancy test is not one you can study for... you either pass or you fail. It's absolutely out of our hands. We have no control. I kinda hate not having control...

After the bus picked up the kids for their first day of school this morning, I went directly to the clinic to have my blood drawn. It was later than I wanted, about 8:45. I walked in and of course there are a ton of people waiting. I go into a mini panic (just in my mind) and realize it will take longer to get my blood drawn and tested and we'll have to wait longer to hear from IVF. Ugh! The wait is dreadful!

I have been very busy this morning running to the appointment, to Target, bringing my daughter to school and running a few other errands. Even though I've been busy, I can't stop thinking about the results. My stomach is in knots and I'm totally on edge. I find myself willing the phone to ring and have it be Dr. S on the other end.

Guy and Dror, those poor guys. It's much later where they are. They have literally been waiting ALL day. I imagine them to be on pins and needles. Keeping their phones close by and checking it constantly to make sure they didn't miss any calls or messages.

So for now we wait...............

August 27, 2013

Pregnancy dream?? Good lord I hope so!

Every pregnant woman will tell you their dreams can be stupidly insane. They tend to be a lot more freakish then they need to be. Leaving the pregnant woman to think "WTF is wrong with me". I had one of these dreams last night. It was totally crazy and in no way do I think even a dream interpreter would touch it. I hope next Tuesday reveals I am pregnant for many many reasons. The newest reason is to explain this psycho dream. Here it is...

I was attending a church service. It was at a church I'd never attended before. I was in the very back crouched down behind everyone doing something I knew was very inappropriate. I knew I'd be in trouble and looked at like a very bad person if I was caught but yet I continued to do it. What was I doing? I was grating a block of cheese. Huh? Yeah, you read that right. I threw my morals aside and was grating a block of cheese until I was finally approached by church staff and asked to leave. The dream ends there so I'm not sure if I continued to grate cheese or if I left. Let's assume I left, but if I did stay let's assume there was a huge spaghetti or taco dinner after the service and I was in charge of bringing the cheese. 

No thanks! I don't want to know.

Please, please, please let this dream be blamed on pregnancy.

August 23, 2013

August 22, 2013

Let the baby baking begin........

These sweet little embryos were transferred yesterday! 

Now we not-so-patiently wait for September 3 to get here. This is the day bloodwork will tell us yay or nay. No peeing on sticks for us. We're gonna tough it out and wait to hear our beta results.

It goes without saying, September 3 can not come fast enough. For now, we just cross our fingers that these little embryos stick!

August 14, 2013

Uterine lining update

Today I had another monitoring appointment. This is a serious one because it could be a major deciding factor... to-transfer or not-to-transfer.

The meds I've been on are assisting in thickening up my uterine lining. A nice cushy lining makes for a cloud like experience for the embryos once they are transferred and gives them a nice opportunity to "stick" to the uterine wall. Most IVF clinics like to see the lining around 7mm or 8mm. Today my lining measured 18mm! Whoa! That is well over the required 7 or 8, but could this be too much?!? I've heard both... it could be bad to have too much fluff or it could be a situation of "the fluffier the better". In my case, it's an a-okay thing.

Tomorrow I start my other IVF goodies... Progesterone, Prometrium, Doxycycline and Prednisone. These added to the goodies I'm already taking minus the Lupron.

The egg donor is prepping for a retrieval either tomorrow or Friday. Jeremy and I fly to San Diego on Sunday in preparation of a Wednesday transfer.

As for Guy and Dror, they are beyond excited. I just love reading/hearing their anxious comments. We've Skyped a few times, but we mostly message each other. Unfortunately, they are not able to physically attend the transfer. They are in the process of moving from one country to another. Big things going on in their world right now... moving & babies. They will attend the transfer via Skype or Facetime. I wish they could be at the transfer in the flesh. It's a special moment between a surrogate and her IPs. Due to the timing it just can't happen, but I know they would absolutely attend if they could.

In other surrogate news, did you hear my TV boyfriend, Jimmy Fallon, recently welcomed his daughter via a surrogate? See... all the cool people are using surrogates these days.

Sweet Winnie Rose

August 07, 2013

Shots and puppies

We are headed in the right direction and all arrows point to an August 21/22 transfer. Whoa... is that like less than two weeks from now?!? Yep, it really really is. We are close. So close we can almost feel it. I feel like maybe I should knock on wood for saying everything is going great. A little like I'm being overconfident and getting a little too big for my britches, but I think this is going to happen as scheduled. My lining is getting its "fluff" on and the egg donor, from what I understand, is right on track.

Last Thursday I was given the go ahead to start Delestrogen. If you remember, this is one of the honkin' big shots. And by honkin' big, I mean a needle almost as long as my pinkie finger. This mother has to be injected all the way into my thigh or upper tush. Currently I'm taking it in my thigh.

I swear this photo doesn't capture the true intimidation rolling off this needle. It's much bigger/longer than it appears.

So far I have been able to give myself the shots. I only gave myself Lupron shots during my first journey and had Jeremy give me the two long needle shots. I'm actually pretty proud of myself for getting over the anxiety of it. I'm giving myself pep talks and listening to "We are the champions" while I ice the area I'm about to inject. Okay not really but it sounds fun so maybe I'll start.

I had my third monitoring appointment today and am waiting to hear if everything looks great. I could see on the screen that my uterus is cooperating, but I'll hear from IVF soon to verify it looks as good as it should. Fingers crossed!

In other news... IT'S A BOY!

Bernard the pup

I know many of you have already heard Bernie's story but I thought I would share it again here on my blog. Bernie is a 3 month old rescue pup. About a month ago my daughter went to South Dakota on a church mission trip. She called me a few days into the trip to tell me about the crazy number of stray dogs. Now, I'm sure there were quite a few stray dogs but you know the mind of a teenager... she made it seem there were thousands. One pup in particular caught her eye and stole her heart. This pup was living around the house the youth group was restoring. He was staying there with his mama and two siblings. The mama had an owner but they weren't interested in keeping the pups. Another youth group member's mom operates a no-kill rescue organization in our city and agreed to find a foster home for the pups until they could be adopted.

We weren't sure we were really ready for another dog, especially a puppy. We already have a chocolate lab and 4 kids running around our chaotic house. But I knew Kaelyn's love for this puppy was strong and she's at an age where she can really take care of a pup. Without Kaelyn's acknowledge, I began the adoption process. On the night we went to pick him up the kids were all fired up about the "secret family mission" I had been talking about for two days. The kids had tons of ideas as to what we would be doing on the mission, but my favorite was one of the last ideas they came up with. "Are we getting shots?!?!" I laugh at this because in order to get a few of them their flu shots we need to trick them into the car. I told them I would never hype up the mission this much if it were shots. I'm not that cruel.

We walked into PetSmart, where the adoption was taking place, and Kaelyn found out very quickly what was happening. Not surprisingly, there were tears and giggles. Bernie and Kaelyn were reunited and it was such a happy moment.
A girl and her pup

July 18, 2013

Special delivery!

Mr. Fed Ex stopped by today with my goodie box.

I'm gonna need a larger medicine cabinet!

The goodie box included:

14 day supply of Leuprolide (Lupron)
32 Vivelle patches
5 different oral medications
2 vials of Delestrogen
4 vials of Progesterone Oil (I think I needed more last time)
Bag and bags of alcohol wipes and needles... oh lord, so many many needles! Large pointy, sticky needles.

First monitoring appointment is scheduled for July 22.

Let the good times roll!

July 14, 2013

*Who has two thumbs and an...

Estimated transfer date?? ME!

*My apologies... my lameness comes out when I 'm excited!

Dr. S. (the man with a plan in San Diego) called me this morning with an estimated egg retrieval and transfer date. Egg retrieval is expected to be August 15/16 and transfer will be around August 21/22.

I was told to start birth control and baby aspirin today. Which I did immediately after hanging up the phone and messaging Guy and Dror. The rest of the medication will arrive soon.

Eekkk!! There are so many people excited about this news!

If you need me, I'll be doing this........................................

July 08, 2013

Just drifting....

Summer is slowly sliding by and we are waiting oh so patiently to hear news of an estimated transfer date. A new egg donor was found quickly, but the paperwork and bloodwork take time. We are aiming for an August transfer, but I'm not sure we'll make it. I haven't received word to start birth control pills and baby aspirin. I'll take those meds for a few weeks before starting Lupron and then a few weeks after starting Lupron, the hardcore meds start. I estimate a good 5 or 6 weeks of meds before transfer even happens.

Moving transfer back another month or more makes me nervous for a couple of reasons:

A) school starts in September and I don't want to miss my kids' first few days of school. Also, with school starting, childcare will get a little tricky while Jeremy and I go to CA for transfer. No doubt we'll have help, but it will be a little different than we hoped.

B) this reason is huge... literally. I do not want to be pregnant during the summer. Being just-pregnant during the summer months is one thing, but being 8/9 months pregnant (with twins, fingers crossed) is something completely different. No thank you! Call me a poor sport, a wimp or whatever. Summer is busy for us. Kids need to be on the go or they lose their minds and start crashing through walls and dancing on the ceiling. Chasing my kids and daycare kids outside in 90F temps while being the size of a beluga whale isn't my idea of a good time. And let's not even get into the swelling of ankles topic.

C) lastly, I'm just ready already! I am excited to get this show on the road. I like schedules and structure. Just to know an estimated transfer date will calm me.

I talked to Guy and Dror this morning. They are thinking we will hear more from IVF by Wednesday. I'm hoping so! We have a Skype date tomorrow, very much looking forward to that.

In other news, Ella and Ely are doing amazing! They have this ability of making their daddies fall in love with them over and over again. They get cuter and cuter everyday. I get pictures through iCloud quite often and every single picture brings a smile to my face and causes my heart to skip a beat or two. Out of respect I am no longer sharing their pictures here on my blog (insert big sad face). Honestly, I was lucky to have shared the pictures I did. Neither Roy or Avner have shared the kids' pictures on a social media/public site. Ever. They share only in private albums. They are doing what they can to protect their kids and I understand that.

June 18, 2013

Rainbow Scarf Project

I am blessed to be a member of the UCC community. It's something I'm proud of. Unfortunately, with 3 rowdy boys I don't attend service very often so it's important to me to find other ways to help out in order to feel I am an active member of the church community.

Spreading awareness is a big deal at UCC. Whether it's about bullying or equality for all. We believe in discriminating against no one... at all... for any reason.

The buzz at Peace UCC this summer is the Rainbow Scarf Project.

Heard of it? The goal is to spread awareness about violence and bullying, especially against LGBT teens.

What's the idea of the project? Scarves from many states are headed to Long Beach, CA. Throughout the summer people will wear these scarves. Others will wonder (and hopefully ask) why in the heck these crazy people are wearing scarves in the middle of summer in CA. If asked about it, the one wearing the scarf will explain the project's hopes and offer it to the inquiring mind. If the person accepts the scarf they are committing to take action.

When I heard about the project from my pastor, I knew this could be another opportunity for me to help out. I learned how to crochet a few years ago and a scarf would be no biggie to make.

I searched for just the right yarn. I wanted something that screamed, something vibrant and beautiful. I did find a beautiful yarn and although it didn't "scream" the way I hoped it would, the scarf turned out pretty great. Very soon, it will be on its way to CA along with the many other scarves our congregation made.

The scarves made by our congregation! Picture courtesy of Pastor Kayla

The scarf I made!
If you are in CA this summer and see someone wearing a rainbow scarf, please ask them about it and make a commitment to do your part to stop bullying. You know what... even if you aren't fortunate enough to go to CA or to come across someone wearing a scarf, do something, anything to spread a little love. Any effort, big or small, could mean the world to someone else.

June 03, 2013


Unless you are snagging an awesome deal at a department store or snagging a dream job, snags are not especially great. Snags in a sweater, snags in a plan... not great. They are often times frustrating, unexpected and unwelcomed little doings. 

Our snag: the egg donor has decided she can not commit. The news came late last week. I was on schedule to start my meds yesterday. We had a plan already in place. We were all hopeful for a mid-July transfer.

Transfer will likely be pushed back now. I'm okay with a short delay, but I do feel bad for Dror and Guy. They, much like all IP's, are ecstatic about being parents. The sooner the better. I imagine the IVF process can feel a bit like chasing a runaway balloon. If you lose your grip on even a small part of it, the dream could float away forever. Dror and Guy have already had a few bumps in the IVF road. It's emotionally hard to go through these disappointments. It makes the process stressful and leaves IPs questioning if and when they'll be holding a child of their own.

Luckily this snag can be resolved by find another egg donor. It's not something so drastic that it will put an end to their dreams of becoming parents. But it is a big deal. I mean, it is the other half of their future children.

I will know more throughout the next few weeks, but in the meantime, (yes, I'm asking again) please send positive vibes!

May 29, 2013

What this summer will bring

We're moving forward, people. I mean really moving forward! A few weeks ago, I had an exam with Dr S. in San Diego and what I can tell you is that it's safe to do a happy dance because... my good ole uterus passed with flying colors! This means we have a set date to start medications and an estimated date of transfer. Just typing the word "transfer" is super exciting.

I start birth control pills, prenatal vitamins and baby aspirin this weekend. In mid-June, I'll start Lupron. July 1, I'll start patches & delestrogen and progesterone shortly after that. Our estimated transfer date is July 20.

According to my calendar, I'll be knocked up in less than 2 months! By September, I'll be puking my guts out and it will take all my energy to just breathe. Oddly, I'm okay with that. I know from experience that the outcome is absolutely worth the misery.

Stay tuned!

May 15, 2013

Marriage equality in Minnesota... just got real

Minnesota celebrated an amazing victory this week! 

This huge victory comes just 6 months after we successfully voted NO to an amendment that would have permanently and constitutionally limited the freedom of gays and lesbians to ever marry in Minnesota.

My daughter proudly wore her "Vote NO" shirt to school, to church, to the store...

Here we are only 6 months after shooting down that ridiculous amendment and our governor, Gov Mark Dayton, has signed the bill legalizing gay marriage.

Senator Scott Dibble (Bill author) watches as Governor Dayton signs the bill

A few friends were able to visit the state capitol this week. They graciously allowed me to use their photos here.

Crowd at the state capitol in St Paul (courtesy of Michael Garner)
Wabasha Street Bridge (courtesy of Michael Garner)

Inside the state capitol (courtesy of Pastor Kayla Bonewell)

Outside the state capitol (courtesy of Pastor Kayla Bonewell)
Both Michael and Pastor Kayla are HUGE HUGE advocates for gay rights. Bless them and everyone else who helped make dreams come true this week. 

More photos (courtesy of the Internet): 


Minnesota just got a whole lot AWESOMER (yep, I know it's not a word)! 

Let us be a role model.